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     I am so jealous of normal people, who don't suffer from so much anxiety, who are able to talk nicely to each other, stay in their shitty world without an ounce of curiosity. I wish I was them. I am so rude damnit. I wish I had a lot of friends I could chill with. I wish I could be productive without overthinking productivity and how its an idea propagated by our society because they were too afraid of the capabilities of an idle brain. I hate how I question everything so much that it feels like anything I do is only doomed. I feel so jealous man, of all these people living their little boring lives happily, without any regrets, without any questions. Partying like dumbfucks and imitating each other. I mean I wish I was them. I wish I could just let go that easily. 

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